A customer walked into a wholesaler and placed a large order. When his account was brought up, it was flagged for an overdue balance, and he was told that his order could not be accepted.
The customer pleaded that they give him another chance and gave his word that he would pay as soon as he gets back home.
Recognizing that this was habitual, the owner of the company told him firmly that if he does not pay up what he owes he will not receive any goods.
The customer was desperate, and began raising his voice while pleading that they give him his order on credit. By this time, other customers arrived and overheard the commotion. They were also aware of this customer’s history of being in arears in his payments and understood where the owner was coming from.
As the line grew progressively longer due to the hold-up at the counter, a clever customer came forth with the following advice. “This customer wishes to get a wholesale price in order to turn a profit. He is ordering in bulk because of the policy of the company. If I may suggest, make an exception and sell him in small quantities at the wholesale price and insist that he pays for it with cash that he has on him. This way he will be able to gradually get back on his feet and have the ability to keep afloat and eventually will even have the wherewithal to pay back what he owes.”
The owner and the customer agreed to the recommendation. The customer regrouped and progressively was able pay off his debt and trust was restored.
The saintly Chofetz Chaim used this example to encourage and inspire us how to approach an observance that we may feel overwhelmed to take on in its fullness.
The customer who gave a large order which he wasn’t able to pay for, is similar to someone who says, “I’ll never again speak Lashon Harah – ill of another fellow.” Such a broad statement may be a bit overwhelming for one to ‘fully pay up on.’
However, if one begins with starting off being careful about talking negatively about others in small doses – it will allow one to gradually become more sensitized to the laws of Lashon Harah and to the feelings of others and he will be able to rise to a place where he should be.
We are currently in the three-week mourning period over the destruction of our Temples that stood in Jerusalem. A reason why the Jews were undeserving to have G-d’s Temple in their midst is because Jews did not get along with each other – there was hatred and issues between each other. G-d said, “My House on earth represents and creates peace between Me and My nation through the sacrifices and services. It cannot exist if My children cannot get along with each other.”
Thus, a way to restore our third and everlasting Temple is through curtailing and ending our verbal or typed negativity towards our brethren.
Generally speaking, if one pauses a second or two to take into consideration the possible negative impact of one’s words before dispensing them, it can make a huge difference in the way we converse, post and respond and will not compromise the standing or image of another.
The portion in which Aaron the High Priest passed away is generally read during this three week mournful period of the year. The Torah tells us the date of Aaron’s death, which is the first day of the Month of Av (Friday). A thought-provoking message may be gleaned from the Torah uncharacteristically telling us the date of a Yahrtzait of a person.
People take Yahrtzaits of their loved ones seriously. A candle is lit, Kaddish is recited, prayers are led in synagogue, charity is given, some fast, some study Mishna in memory or make a Siyum – complete a tractate of the Talmud. All this is done to elevate the soul of the departed. A Yahrtzait is a time to reflect on the virtues of the departed.
Aaron excelled in the area of being able to bring peace between feuding parties. He did it cleverly and effectively. The Torah tells us that Aaron’s Yahrtzait is on Rosh Chodesh Av – a date when our mourning of the Temples intensifies, when we don’t eat meat, drink wine, bathe in an enjoyable way, or launder clothing until after the fast of Tisha B’av. Perhaps Aaron’s Yahrtzait at this time is to remind us to emulate his ways by focusing on engendering peace between us. It will elevate his soul and inspire and enrich our lives!
A father was watching as his son was struggling to lift a heavy object in the yard. He called out to his son, “you aren’t using all your strength.” The son tried harder and it was still not working. Again, his father called out, “you are not using all your strength.” A bit frustrated the son tried again and turned to his father saying, “I gave it all I have; I have no strength left.” The father said, “Oh yes you do…you could ask me to help.”
During the course of our day, there may be times when we feel overwhelmed by a certain task, call, message, news item, family issue or financial load and we may feel like we don’t have the strength to handle it. Calling out to our Father in Heaven for help during these moments is the most effective way to tap into our Father in Heaven where our ultimate strength and abilities come from!
